Confirmed - Here we go again

September 11, 2026

Yesterday, I got the call. The confirmation of my 3rd cancer. Olfactory Neuroblastoma, Grade III. The plan is to have a detailed MRI and appointment with my two surgeons (Head and Neck surgeon and Neurosurgeon) on Friday, September 25th and then surgery on Monday, September 28th at MD Anderson. Then radiation treatment for 6 weeks, Mon-Fri, which means I will have to temporarily move down to Houston for 6 weeks, most likely sometime in November into December. I spoke to my doctor's PA and even though it is a grade 3, she said this type of cancer is usually slow-growing and seemed to think that they can get it all out with surgery. Once radiation is done, I can put it all behind me, she says. I wish I was feeling that optimistic. But after a while, all the treatments and the constant not feeling good begins to wear on a person. At least I know why I still don't feel great, even after my breast cancer treatment was completed. 

Even though I feel like I was expecting it, I'm still struggling with it. I am overwhelmed. I don't know why I have to go through this again. I keep wondering, what lesson didn't I learn the last time that I have to go through this all again? The good thing about going to MD Anderson is they will be scheduling all my appointments so I won't have to worry about that. The bad thing is that I will have to arrange hotel or airbnb/vrbo visits and eventually plan an extended stay somewhere for when I have radiation. I am worried about the travel and the money since I will have to take off those weeks from work and most likely will have to pay to stay somewhere. But I also feel good about my decision to go to MD Anderson because I feel confident in their abilities to treat me and hopefully, get me back to healthy.

One other thing I was told during the call was that the Pet scan showed uptake in my left breast and that I should follow up with my doctor at Texas Oncology about that. The funny thing is that I had access to the pet scan results but I didn't even realize it said this because I was so focused on the head and neck (I also have a lesion on my spine at the back of my neck). I have sent the results over to my doctor here at Texas Oncology. He called me right away and said he thinks it is just residual from all the treatment I had done but he would order a mammogram for me, just in case. I really pray that that cancer is not back, as well. I'm not sure I can handle it. 

Anyway, that is all the updates. The next two weeks, I will be preparing for the surgery. It is scary because it is so close to the brain so that makes me nervous. But I have to trust the surgeons know what they are doing and will be able to get everything out. I am also just so weary, like my bones just feel heavy. It all seems so unbelievable. But there is nothing more I can do but trust God and His plan, whether that means live another 30 years or if my time here is limited. It's all up to Him. And so, that just means I have to be more intentional with how I live going forward. 

"If all roads lead to Rome, who am I to try and change it? who am I to try and change it? If all roads lead to Rome, I know better than to try and play God. I'll leave the big man to the big jobs."

All Roads by Abby Urkawich

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?

Matthew 6:25-27