Last Tuesday, October 31st, I had my final chemo treatment. I got the ring the bell and yeah, it's great to see the end of that tunnel. However, I still have to go through the rest of the side effects for the coming weeks.
It's hard to describe how it feels after chemo. The day of and next day are not too bad, just tired. But then it's like you go into a chemo coma. It feels as if the clouds not just are on top of you, but all around you. You are so tired and your brain is so foggy. You are irritated and annoyed. You can't keep your eyes open. Your stomach hurts and your muscles and bones ache. You have a headache. You lose your taste. You have these hot flashes that make you feel like you are on fire every so often. Honestly, you lose at least 3 days where all you want to do is sleep. It's hard to keep up with life or people or social media. You don't know what you need or what you are doing half the time. It's exhausting moving from the bed to the couch. After about 4 days, you start to see cracks in the clouds. You will have an hour or two where you finally feel like you are starting to be a person again. But the breaks will only last so long and then you will get so tired and feel like you are back in the clouds. Eventually, the breaks come more often and little by little you feel like you are returning to "normal". Even though, there is no normal anymore. But just better than you were, anyway. As the days go on, it does get better and better but you will always tire out more easily than you would like. When you start to feel good, you will overdo it and then pay the price later. I can't wait until the effects are all gone, I start getting my hair back and most importantly, can fully taste food again!!
I thought that I would have at least 2 weeks rest before radiation, but as momma says, "there is no rest for the weary." In order to try and finish all my treatments by years end, I found out the day before chemo that I had to start radiation this week. So, they squeezed me in for the mapping CT scan during my chemo day and I have started radiation just one week later. They are a little concerned about the burning since I'm doing it so close to chemo and apparently, my chemo is radio sensitive so I may burn worse than some. But I am also glad they are flexible and willing to help me get all the treatments done before the end of the year. So, here we go onto the next phase of fun!
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